Sav on Saturday

I wish I had something profound to share with you all this week. The truth is, I have really been struggling these past few days, and I have not done very much Bible reading. I've done a lot of praying, but not much listening. Nonetheless, God continues to reach out to me because His grace is given based on who He is, not based on what I do to earn it.

I did find comfort in this passage:

"Don't fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God's wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It's wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life" (Philippians 4:6-7).

If I may be honest, worry has been the center of my life this past week. I worry about finding a job. I worry about fitting in at NorthRidge Church in Plymouth. I worry about my past failures. I worry about my present failures. I worry about never getting better. I worry about disappointing my parents. I worry about what people would think of me if they knew I have depression and anxiety. I worry about what people would do if they caught me scratching my arms. I worry about God giving up on me. I even worry about worrying!

I've been spiraling down, and it is absolutely frightening. The one hope I cling to is that God has not forgotten me. I am not invisible to the King of this world. Like the psalms proclaim again and again, God hears my cry for help.

With that said, I haven't done much this week besides worry. I'm working on a new quilt, but I haven't gotten much done at this point. I haven't even read much! I'm just hoping for a fresh start tomorrow.

I miss you all and love you so very much!