oopsie...late again!

I've gotta say, though, it's really cool that we've been able to keep this blog up all the way into July!

I've been reflecting a lot on my pride lately, especially spiritual pride and how it impedes a proper attitude of service within the church. I really liked this passage in Isaiah--I'm still about a month behind in the BRP. The language is pretty strong and definitely rebuked me.

"O LORD, you will ordain peace for us,

for indeed, all that we have done,

you have done for us...

Like a woman with child,

who writhes and cries out in her pangs

when she is near her time,

so were we because of you, O LORD;

we were with child, we writhed,

but we gave birth only to wind.

We have no victories on earth,

and no one is born to inhabit the world."

-Isaiah 26: 12, 16-18

Similarly to what Shelby said, I too often follow God half-heartedly, keeping my plans as a back-up in case what He has for me "doesn't work out"...or more often, keeping God's plans as a back-up because I think I know what's best for me. I'm just realizing again lately how me-centered I am and my life is. Even self-consciousness or attempted modesty are really disguised pride because they're still very centered on myself and not on what God can do.

So I think a few things really struck me about this passage:

1. That everything "I" have done, has really been God, so I should stop trying to take credit for it.

2. That, like a woman in labor, I have struggled and tried to hard to do things on my own, but in the end it all results in nothing ("gave birth only to wind") if God didn't ordain those plans.

3. God will "ordain peace for us" if we follow His plans.

I know this stuff, but I think I still struggle to believe it and place my life on it. I feel like there have been a lot of those sorts of things this summer. I pray that as I have a lot of free time on my hands over these next months, I will really use it to discover more of God's character, and really dig beyond the surface level of what I know to find out what I really believe.

The update is pretty brief here. I spent the weekend at home which was really nice. I spent a lot of quality time with family and the family at my home church. Then Monday and Tuesday my mom and I took a trip up to Grayling and stayed at the cabin of one of the members of our church. It was very relaxing and we had a lot of good convos.

Today, I met with my LCG in the Arb and then decided to stay for a bit of a personal retreat...except I fell asleep for like 2 hours after reflecting for a bit. Oh well. It was relaxing and I got to enjoy the beautiful weather!